Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 61942 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 310(@200wpm)___ 248(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 61942 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 310(@200wpm)___ 248(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
“I hope you have room in your closet for all these clothes.”
“I do.”
“Good. Because I’m not leaving anyone behind.”
The corner of his lips quirked up in a smile before he took a seat on the floor, leaning against the wall, his arms resting on his knees. “When do you think you’ll be ready?”
“In a couple days. It’s hard to get anything done when I’m at work all day.”
“Do you want to keep any of the furniture?”
“No. It would look hideous in your apartment.” But it was nice that he offered.
“Hungry?”
“You know I’m always hungry.”
His lips quirked up again before he got to his feet. “Where do you want to go?”
“Something casual.” I was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, something I didn’t care about while I worked in the apartment. “I don’t exactly look my best.” I wasn’t even wearing makeup because I would just sweat it off.
“Really? I didn’t even notice.”
We went to a café that served sandwiches and coffee, and after we ordered our food and carried it to the table, we sat across from each other. I could drink coffee all day, every day, so I didn’t shy away from having an espresso in the evening. Bartholomew ordered a coffee because it was morning for him.
Our relationship had been different ever since he’d told me how he felt.
That he loved me.
I’d been so lonely these last seven years, and that loneliness had reached a breaking point when my father betrayed me. Without a family, I felt like I was in limbo, never belonging anywhere, never being missed because there was no one to notice I was gone. But now, everything was different.
I felt complete. I felt like I belonged. I felt like…I had a family.
He was everything I needed.
He held the sandwich in a single hand, his elbow on the table, his black coffee steaming. He stuck out here, not because of all the black he wore, but because he was so insanely good-looking. He stuck out in every room that had people. “What is it, sweetheart?”
“Sorry?” I realized I was holding my sandwich without taking a bite. I just stared at him, like a weirdo. “I was just thinking…”
“About?”
“Um…” A lot of thoughts had transpired in the past minute, but I didn’t share any of them. “I don’t want to be one of those women who obsesses over the future, but…does more include marriage? Because…I’d like to marry you someday.” He was a hard man to read, and unless I explicitly asked him for information, I wouldn’t know the truth.
“Am I the kind of man you’d want to marry?”
“Yes.” I said it without hesitation, without doubt.
“Because your previous concerns are still valid.”
He was a dangerous man living in a dangerous world—and that meant I was vulnerable. It would always weigh in the back of my mind. “I know you’ll always keep me safe.”
His reaction was subtle, but it was enough to show how much that meant to him.
“I know you’ll always protect me.” I meant those words, because I would never consider a life with him if I didn’t. He wasn’t what I’d wanted in the beginning, but I knew I would never love another man the way I loved him. I wanted him for the rest of my life.
“I’m open to marriage—someday.”
It was a dream come true, and I should have just left it alone, but I wanted to know. “And kids?”
His mood dropped at the question. “You should already know the answer to that.”
“You said you would never tell me you loved me or ask me to marry you—but that changed.”
“Only because you made it clear you didn’t want those things—not because I didn’t want to. You think I get irrationally jealous over a lesser man just for the hell of it? You think I demanded to be your man because I’m a possessive asshole? No, it was because I was in love with you, Laura.”
Our history had been rewritten with those words.
“But kids—I won’t change my mind about that.”
God, it hurt.
“It would be irresponsible to have them anyway, given what I do. What kind of parents would we be if we thought that environment was appropriate? You know that better than anyone after all the shit you’ve been through.”
“Well…in that scenario, you would be retired.”
His eyes stilled like I’d just insulted him. “I’m annoyed by this conversation, but I realize it’s necessary before you move in. So let me be absolutely clear in this. There’s no scenario in which we have children. There’s no scenario in which I suddenly decide fatherhood is right for me. Not everyone is meant to be a parent—and certainly not me.”
“Not even to be with the woman you love…?”
His answer was immediate. “No.”
“Can I ask you something?”
He gave an audible sigh, like this conversation was causing him a headache.
“Is it because you don’t want children or because you deem yourself inadequate to raise them?”