Total pages in book: 64
Estimated words: 60081 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60081 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
“I’m sure your cookies are as fabulous as the rest of you, but the doctor isn’t a woman. He’s a man and…my brother.” I laugh, the horror on her face too intense not to be funny. “It’s okay. He’s a great guy.”
“But he’s your brother,” she wheezes. “If we do start dating, which I hope we will because I like you, then I’d run into him in social settings. And when I do, I will always think of this night and how he’s seen my private parts in the weirdest context possible.”
“He’s a gynecologist,” I say. “I’m sure he’s been in weirder contexts. You should hear some of the stories—”
“No!” She screeches, making it clear I’ve said the wrong thing. “I don’t want to hear the stories, and I really don’t want to become one of them. Let’s just go to the ER. It’ll suck and might require reliance on my old gymnast training to get in the car, but it’ll be worth it in the end.”
“Then the story will be all over town,” I say, hating that it’s true, but it is. “Steve the bartender was wrong. My mom isn’t the biggest gossip in town, the brother and sister who run the billing department at the medical center are. We breeze in there joined at the you know what, and by tomorrow morning, all of Bad Dog will know we had to be surgically separated.”
“But what about HIPAA? They can’t gossip about a medical procedure!”
“They shouldn’t, no, but that’s never stopped them before,” I say. “And I try to avoid suing people who are distant relations. Third cousins, but still…”
Her forehead furrows. “So, we’re screwed? There’s no hope? I’m going to be known as the loose hussy with the clit ring no matter what?”
“You’re not a loose—”
“Because I don’t know if I can handle that, Drew,” she says, her voice rising. “I never did anything this embarrassing in my old hometown, but people gossiped about me nonstop anyway. My family was the butt of every joke around there, for generations. We’re the weirdos people feel free to make fun of even though it sucks and negatively impacts the lives of odd, but otherwise perfectly great people. I came here for a fresh start, a chance to be known for who I am apart from all that.” Her face begins to crumble and her voice to waiver. “But if this happens, then it’s over. I might as well pack up and go home because there won’t be a fresh start. There will only be shame and humiliation and probably soreness because it’s starting to hurt a little already and will probably hurt even more by the time we get all the way to the hospital.”
“Don’t cry, sweetheart,” I say, cupping her face in my hands and kissing her forehead. “Don’t cry and don’t you dare think about packing up and going home after you just promised me a second date.”
She sniffs. “I’m sorry, I just wanted things to be better. More normal. And now it’s all ruined because we had to get spicy with our piercings. Why didn’t we get pierced in a nice, normal place like the ear or the nose or through the loose skin on our necks?”
“Well, I can’t speak for you, but I’m a lawyer and visible piercings are frowned upon in the office and courtroom. Also, nose rings seem unsanitary, and that neck skin thing sounds disturbing.”
“It is,” she says, still sniffling. “It’s just what popped into my head because I’m sad.”
Fuck. I have to fix this.
I can’t let our wonderful night end this way, not when I’m already feeling things for this woman I haven’t felt in ages. She doesn’t want me to call my brother, which I understand, but maybe there’s someone else? Someone—
“Wren!” I blurt out, earning a strange look from Tatum. “Sorry. I was just thinking about who else we could call, and it made me think of Wren, my brother’s head nurse at his practice. She can be a little shy with new people, but not when she’s in nurse mode. I could reach out, see if she’ll help us? I know she’ll keep this quiet. She’s not the type to gossip or even think about violating her HIPAA oath.”
Tatum’s glassy eyes fill with hope. “Yes, please. Let’s try her. And the cookie offer still stands from me. Any flavor she likes.”
Five minutes later, we’ve navigated our way back to the couch—and my cell phone—and have a sleepy-sounding Wren on the line. But even though we’ve clearly woken her up and it’s nearly midnight, she promises to be right over.
“Oh, thank God. And praise Wren. I love her already.” Tatum sags with relief, her forehead touching mine.
Me seated, with her straddling my hips, turned out to be the least painful position for both of us.