Total pages in book: 71
Estimated words: 69330 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 347(@200wpm)___ 277(@250wpm)___ 231(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 69330 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 347(@200wpm)___ 277(@250wpm)___ 231(@300wpm)
It was Friday.
Taking up her shoulder-length hair, she studied her reflection in the vanity mirror of her caravan. A messy bun would do. The style made her look more like a normal person, like a woman with an acceptable job, an apartment, and even a small amount of happiness. For one day each month, she needed to look like every other conventional human being.
She took care with her appearance, dressing in a conservative sundress with ballerina flats and applying light make-up. When she was ready, she forced herself to eat breakfast, even if excitement robbed her of an appetite. Then she grabbed her bag and headed for the park.
Arriving thirty minutes early, she sat down in her usual spot and watched each person who entered. Her nerves were all over the place, her heart like a balloon floating up to the sky. As the minutes ticked on, eventually passing the agreed hour, her elation turned to anxiety. They were late. She only realized how hard she was clasping her bag when an ache settled in the joints of her fingers. Forcing herself to relax her grip, she eased her face into a smile.
Ten minutes later, she spotted them. Doumar walked through the gate with a boy in hand. A sob escaped as a gasp. God, how much he’d grown in one month. She could swear he was an inch taller, his shoulders broader. She waited for them to approach, drinking in the sight of his blond hair and blue eyes. He walked straight, with pride, occasionally glancing at Doumar as if searching for his approval. She soaked up every second, took note of every detail, until they stopped in front of her.
“Say hello,” Doumar said, giving the smaller hand a nudge.
Niels lifted his head to look at her shyly. “Hello, Mommy.”
She swallowed twice to get rid of the lump in her throat and held out her hand. “Hello, big man.”
Niels looked at her fingers but didn’t move. His passive regard hurt, but she forced it down, unwilling to spoil the moment.
“Go to her,” Doumar urged, giving him a push.
He moved forward reluctantly and climbed onto the bench.
“You have fifteen minutes,” Doumar said. “I’m over there.” He pointed at a bench not far away.
As soon as Doumar was gone, she turned her undivided attention to her son, addressing him in English, as per Doumar’s order. Niels wasn’t allowed to speak Dutch at home. “You look handsome.”
“Thank you.”
“How’s the new school?”
“Okay.”
“Did you make friends?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know.”
She smoothed back his soft hair, dying a bit at the involuntary cringe that made his body draw into itself at her touch. “Did you try what I told you?”
He met her eyes with a streak of defiance he’d definitely gotten from her. “It was a stupid idea. They laughed at me.”
“Why?”
“They don’t like my game.”
“What game did you invent?”
“Explorer. We were supposed to sail to Africa and conquer new lands.”
“Exploring sounds like a good game. I’ll play it with you.”
He looked down and pulled on the hem of his T-shirt. “It doesn’t matter. Daddy says I don’t need friends anyway.”
Cupping his cheek, she turned his face her way. “I’m your friend.”
“You don’t count.”
She bit her lip. “Don’t I?”
“You can’t climb a tree, and if you can’t climb all the way up you can’t board the ship.”
“You’ll be surprised. I’ve climbed many trees in my day.”
He looked at her skeptically. “If you say so. I’m not really worried about making friends. I’m going to a different school next semester.”
Doumar shouldn’t move him around so much. He was the kind of child who needed stability. “How come?”
“We’re moving. It’s closer to our new home.”
“Where to?”
“Daddy says I’m not supposed to tell.”
“Is it nice? Will you have a big room?”
“It’s okay, I guess. There’s a garden.”
“Good. I hope there’s a tree so that you can sail for Africa.”
A faint smile lifted his lips. “There’s no tree, but Daddy bought a barbecue.”
“Are you eating all your fruit and veggies?”
“Not always. Granny doesn’t force me.”
“Good.” She took his hand, and this time, he didn’t pull away. “I wouldn’t want her to. How’s the football practice?”
“I stopped going. I prefer playing the piano.”
“That’s all right, liefje. We’re all different. You have to do what makes you happy.”
“Are you happy?”
“Of course I am.” She patted his hand. “I only wish I could spend more time with you.”
“Why can’t you?”
“It’s my job. I don’t have a choice, but not a moment goes by that I wish it weren’t different. Some things in life we can’t change, but I’ll always have this,” she squeezed his hand, “these moments with you. They’re all I live for. You’re all I live for, and you must never forget that.”
“I wish you could be around like other moms.”
“Me too.”
“The kids in my class, they say I’m different. Maybe if you’re around we’ll be like other families.”