Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 87933 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87933 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
“You need me for that? I might stay up a bit longer. It’s nice here. Relaxing.” He’s not looking at me as he talks, and I don’t know what’s up with that, but I lean in again so the others can’t hear what I have to say.
“I wasn’t thinking of going to sleep.”
His cock twitches against my leg, but he doesn’t respond. At least, not at first. He stares straight ahead with a passive look on his face.
I thought this would have been a simple answer for him. He’s about to win this stupid bet. Again. I really should have heeded my own advice when I said to never bet against Jordan.
But right now, on the cusp of winning, there’s something in the way he refuses to look me directly in the eye, the way his hand leaves my thigh, and even in the way he taps my leg for me to stand.
“We’re going to bed.” Could I make that sound any more like “We’re going to have sex”? But surprising me, and maybe Jordan too by the way he hovers around, the guys don’t say anything. Maybe they are letting up on all the sex stuff.
Or maybe I’m telling them all they need to know, like I have some sex beacon flashing or something. Ooh, is this what gaydar actually is? Queer people can detect when queer stuff is about to go down.
Fuck, don’t think about anything going down.
We amble up the stairs, Jordan particularly slow, and I get the sense that maybe we’re not on the same page.
I wait for him by my door, and his feet stall near his. The hallway seems long and empty between us.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
“Tired.”
My gaze narrows, and I take tentative steps toward him. “You know, if you were ever going to win the bet, now’s your chance.”
Can I make it any clearer?
Jordan’s lips twitch. “Oh, I understood that. I think everyone down there knew exactly what your plans were when we came up here. You need to work on subtlety.”
“Geez, first I’m too awkward and twitchy, and now I’m too obvious? Did I skip the middle ground?”
“Seems there’s only two speeds with you.”
“So … you’re not interested in coming in my bedroom? Excuse the double entendre … no, wait, don’t excuse it.”
Jordan throws his head back. “Blake.”
“What?”
His gray eyes meet mine. “I like you. I really do. I realized when you brought me here you might be the closest thing I have to a genuine friend in Hollywood. You’re someone real, which is really rare in our industry.”
“And?”
The struggle in his eyes is evident.
“Oh, you actually don’t want to … with me.”
“Holy fuck do I ever, but it’s … and …” He sighs.
I step even closer and put my hand on his biceps.
Bad move. Even that is putting me on edge. Jordan’s here rejecting me, but my dick isn’t getting the memo.
“It’s me,” I say. “You can tell me anything. Just say it. No judgment, remember?”
Jordan can’t even look at me as he says it. “I don’t want you to be like the others.”
“What others?” My face falls as hard as my hand from his arm. “Oh.”
“I’m not saying …” He’s quick to jump in. “Well, I am saying, but I don’t mean you’re going to be an asshole like the others were, but I’m getting over Ben, and I’ve been here so many times before. You have no idea how much I want to be this guy for you.” Jordan pulls me against him. “You can feel it.”
I sure can.
“But there comes a time I think in everyone’s life where they have to choose self-preservation. And, really, I probably should’ve done that the second I found out Ben was cheating on me.”
My heart breaks for him, which only makes me want to wrap him in my arms and console him, but I also know that this must be difficult for him. It’s obvious he wants me, so I’m not questioning that, and if I push my way into his room and be there for him, it’s a temptation he doesn’t want.
He’s asking me to back off, so I will.
I step away so I’m not tempted to change my mind. “I would never want to be like the other guys you’ve been with.”
“I know, but—”
“No,” I’m quick to say. “That wasn’t me trying to persuade you to change your mind. I just wanted you to know that. You deserve so much better than Ben.”
“I know that too.” He smiles, but it’s weak.
“I’m going to go to bed. In, uh, my room. Away from yours.”
“That’s probably best. I think you have all the material you need for the movie.”
Right. The movie. The whole reason we landed here in the first place.
“Goodnight.” I turn on my heel and head for my room, trying to stop the disappointment from seeping in, but I think it’s too late.