Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 57804 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 289(@200wpm)___ 231(@250wpm)___ 193(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 57804 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 289(@200wpm)___ 231(@250wpm)___ 193(@300wpm)
“He only needs one mic. That’s much easier to record than drums,” Wyatt said with a light chuckle.
“Who runs the program when you’re recording?” I asked him with an amused look on my face.
“Maybe I’ll teach you a thing or two, and you can run it,” Wyatt suggested.
I laughed a little and nudged his shoulder playfully, but I couldn’t even tell if he was joking or not. Hell, he could’ve been serious. Regardless, I sat next to him and watched him, involving myself as much as possible since it wasn’t time for vocals yet.
We worked throughout the whole day, recording ideas and chatting during small breaks. We even started having a few drinks to add a little more fun to the process, while Carson stuck with coffee. Jesse had to leave around two so that he could pick up Maria from school. Then, Amos and Wyatt left to do their run, and Carson left an hour later after recording a guitar part to complement Ryder’s.
By the time it was just me and Ryder in the studio, I already went through a few beers, a warm, fuzzy feeling filling my head. I wished this studio existed when we were younger. Back in the day, our only studio was his bedroom, my voice and his strumming filling the room. We moved his furniture to one side of the room to clear a makeshift stage for us to perform on, and we spent the entire day surrounded by music.
Things were so different now, but the feeling was almost the same.
I relaxed into the couch next to Ryder as he messed around on his electric guitar, plucking a string wrong to make a wavering twang echo throughout the studio. A laugh broke from me, making me hold my stomach as I leaned my shoulder against his.
“It’s not that funny,” Ryder said while cracking up himself. He’d drank quite a bit too.
“Then, why are you laughing?” I replied as we peered at each other, trying to contain our amusement.
Ryder shook his head and repositioned his fingers.
“Your laughter is contagious. I’ve always loved your laugh,” he admitted.
There was that fluttering sensation again.
“Really?” I asked as my smile faltered a little. I wanted to believe that he loved things about me… that he loved me in the past and didn’t want to toss me aside.
Ryder nodded as his face softened.
“Of course,” he said.
My throat tightened as multiple words to say flooded from my mind. I had been nervous to come upon this moment, to have to face him and bring up the past. I had to bring it up eventually.
So, why not now?
“Why did you leave without at least saying goodbye?” I asked him, finally letting the words burst out of me.
Ryder looked away from me, but he didn’t seem surprised that I’d said something. I had a feeling that he expected it. Why would he not when that was the last thing that occurred between us before we stopped talking for years?
“I didn’t want to stop you from going to New York. I was crazy about you, and when we finally got together, I was afraid you’d stay here with me. That you’d toss your opportunity away,” he admitted. “So, I left to make sure that you left as well.”
“Ryder…” I murmured as I placed my hand on his cheek, drawing his eyes to mine. “You should’ve just talked to me. We could’ve figured something out. Long distance or something.”
Ryder put his hand over mine as he shook his head.
“That would’ve just distracted you. And stressed you out. In no way, shape, or form was I going to get in the way of you finally pursuing your dream. I cared about you too much,” he told me.
My heart swelled as my sadness and disappointment melted away. He didn’t leave me because he was selfish or didn’t care. He made a decision that he thought would help me in the end.
That was selfless.
“I was so sad… so angry at you for years,” I admitted before swallowing hard.
“I understand. I don’t blame you, and I should’ve come clean before now,” Ryder said. “I’m sorry, Delilah.”
My eyes burned with happy tears as I smiled at him. I couldn’t fight the wave of old feelings that crashed down on me. I had done my best to fight them off, but how could I when I now knew that he cared that much about me?
“Don’t be,” I said, wanting to just move on. Move forward. My eyes slipped down to his lips, and I felt a strong magnetic pull, coaxing me to lean toward him.
Ryder’s breathing seemed to stop as he leaned in as well, our noses brushing before he suddenly jerked back away from me.
“I… I have a girlfriend,” he reminded me as he looked away from me.
My eyes widened as horror struck me like a punch to the stomach. I couldn’t even draw in a breath, and my happy tears immediately turned into embarrassed ones. Just because he cared about me then didn’t mean that he cared about me now. Not like that, anyway.