Total pages in book: 155
Estimated words: 145634 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 728(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 485(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 145634 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 728(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 485(@300wpm)
Emma parts her lips, but doesn’t say anything. Her eyes are filled with so much sadness. Her voice cracks as she says, “Some things are out of our control. You made a promise you can’t keep.”
I jog down the stairs on my way out to go see Emma. I almost leave without saying bye to Ma. It’s pretty late and I know she went down for a nap earlier, but I want to make sure I see her before I go. It’s a good habit to be in, just so she knows where I am. I see her door's open as I walk toward it to stand in the doorway. My hands grip the molding on the outside, and I lean into the doorway slightly. “Hey, Ma.” I still feel like shit from the other day. It’s been a couple days since Emma was over and I could barely keep it together in front of Ma. She hasn’t mentioned it or brought it up though. That’s what Ma does, she never holds anything against me. It’s what she’s always done, and that’s what I do, too.
She looks up at me, the thin-rimmed glasses on her face slipping down her nose slightly. She closes the thick romance novel in her hands and sets it beside her. “You going out?” I take a few steps into the room, and she keeps on going. “Are you going to go see Emma tonight?” Her brows are raised, and I almost blush from the look on her face.
“I was going to.” I sag into the seat next to her bed.
“I think that girl is good for you, Derek,” she says as she nods her head slightly.
“You just like her because she likes your dirty books, too.” I nod at the book in her hands as I add, “She’s supporting your habit," I joke. I never thought the two of them would have something like that in common.
“It makes me happy to see you so happy, Derek.” Ma’s voice is a little bit more serious. It catches me off guard.
I nod, looking at the thick comforter on Ma’s bed. “She definitely makes me happy. ”Ma’s pale blue eyes seem to get a little bit brighter as her expression softens. It’s a look I don’t remember ever seeing on her face. She clears her throat and brings the comforter up closer around her waist and picks her book back up. “You better go to her then,” she murmurs as she opens her book and pushes her glasses back up her nose. “That girl loves you, Derek; I can see it.” She doesn’t look at me as she says the words. She peeks up at me without moving her head as I rise from the seat. “And you love her too, don’t you?”
“Come on, Ma.” I shoo away her question, tossing my hand in the air and walking toward the door.
“Do your mama a favor and be honest with me right now. It’s something I need to know, Derek.” The look on her face is completely serious, and again I don’t anticipate it.
I think about it, really think about my feelings for Emma. But the truth is, I started loving her a long time ago, and I never stopped. This is nothing new; the love I have for her has been constant. It’s only grown if anything. I grip the handle on the door and nod my head as I say, “Yeah, Ma. I think I love her.”
Ma shakes her head slightly and says, “I know you do.” She sits back in her bed, getting comfortable. “Could you go ahead and shut that door for me, baby?”
I've been so used to her leaving it open, I didn’t think about closing it. “Yeah, love you, Ma.” She gives me a soft smile as she says, “I know you do. And I love you, too. Don’t you ever forget that.”
CHAPTER 15
Emma
I’m going to miss this when I leave for school. That's all I can think as I lie under the comforter in Sandra’s guest room with Derek. This moment feels right, it feels safe. But it’s going to be gone before I know it.
Ever since he broke down and told me about his mom, things have been different. He's finally opening up to me instead of pushing me away. And I feel closer to him than ever before. I've fallen for him. Completely. I'm in love with Derek Wade. The thought makes me want to kiss him and run from him all at the same time. Either way, I’d be left breathless.
“What are you thinking?” he asks me.
He's running his fingers through my hair as I lie with my head on his chest. The sound of his heartbeat is steady and soothing. My fingers lazily trace circles on his bare chest. This moment is so close to being perfect.