Total pages in book: 190
Estimated words: 185785 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 929(@200wpm)___ 743(@250wpm)___ 619(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 185785 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 929(@200wpm)___ 743(@250wpm)___ 619(@300wpm)
He moistens his lips. “My mother was broken. Too broken to look after us properly. Welfare. Food stamps. Sometimes traded those stamps for money for booze. My grandmother regularly stepped in. Took us for weekends. Bought us shoes and clothes. She didn’t have much either, but she did what she could. My mother didn’t even buy birthday or Christmas gifts. She’d spend every last dime she had on whatever abusive asshole she was dating. I was determined my life would be different. I don’t let myself go without.”
“What about your father?” I ask.
“Died when I was four or five. He was a biker. Motorcycle accident. Willie’s father was a good guy, but she cheated on him with her ex and he left. He wanted to take Will and me with him, but she called the cops, lied about him hitting her, and he got arrested. Didn’t see him again.”
“Shit,” I say. “I’m sorry.”
“I don’t talk about this stuff, baby, but I feel comfortable saying it to you.”
I squeeze him, showing my appreciation of his trust, I hope.
“Every asshole after that was worse than the last. And then the last one… they were off and on for a few years, until he killed her.”
My eyes dart up to meet his. I’m shocked.
“Killed her? She’s-”
“She’s dead. Died when I was seventeen. Iadanza didn’t tell you?”
I shake my head. “He only talked about how successful you were, how you weren’t someone to fuck over.”
He rolls his eyes. “Too bad he didn’t practice what he preached.”
I roll my eyes, too. “What happened, though?”
“My grandmother was already gone and I was nearly an adult. Dario’s father paid off the social worker who looked the other way to let me raise my brother. My brother stayed outta trouble, did well in school so it was just him and me after that.”
“Did the guy who hurt your mom go to jail?”
He stares at me for a long minute.
“He got away with it?” I ask, angry.
He cups my jaw. “He didn’t, but I don’t wanna talk about this shit. I wanna look ahead, not back. Look ahead to a future with you.”
I wrap both arms around his neck. “I’m sorry you lost so much, Killian. If you ever wanna talk, I’m here. If you never wanna talk about it, that’s okay, too, but it might help.”
“I gained a lot, Violet. Sounds shit, but the end of that dysfunctional family was the start of better things for me. My mother didn’t give a shit about me or my brother. She cared about getting drunk and being codependent with whichever alcoholic bruiser she was with. The last one used to beat on her and scare the shit out of my little brother. We lived in a toxic apartment in a shitty building full of losers. I’m not glad my mother got her head caved in, but-”
I wince.
He keeps going.
“We were better afterwards. I was doing well with my business, so we lived somewhere nicer, and we were free of the bullshit. Will’s grades improved and his nightmares stopped.”
“I’m sorry it was so hard on you,” I say, thinking that Killian’s nightmares did not stop and knowing by the look in his eyes that he was only too happy to take that burden from his brother.
“You’re beautiful inside and out, Violet. I fucking love you, you know that? You’ve been through a shit time, too, and you’re just embracing life now. It’s a beautiful thing to see you blooming like a pretty flower instead of a sad one.”
I smile.
“You and me are a little alike that way,” he adds. “We were stuck in situations that sucked the life from us. Once we were out of it, we both got a chance to thrive.”
“I guess so, yeah. But I didn’t go through a lifetime of crap. Before three years ago, I had a very normal life. My parents are working class, but we always had enough to eat, gifts, nice clothes, took a vacation once a year. They’re kind and gentle people, always put me and my brother first. They’re better off financially now than they were when I was a kid, but I’ve been really fortunate. My mother made sure we felt grateful, though, you know? We did chores for our allowance. I don’t take things for granted.”
“I can see that about you,” he says. “And it’s part of why I fell for you.”
“Your strength and protectiveness is part of why I fell for you,” I return.
He caresses my face. “You’ll never want for anything again if I have anything to say about it.”
I smile. “You’re so swoony.”
He gives me a surprised look and then his mouth tips up in a bit of a smirk.
“I’m sorry you had it rough growing up, Killian,” I say softly.
His face changes and I see pain there.