Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 64527 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 323(@200wpm)___ 258(@250wpm)___ 215(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 64527 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 323(@200wpm)___ 258(@250wpm)___ 215(@300wpm)
I looked up at her, and I saw her biting down on her lip, hard. The tears were running down her face, but I could tell she was about to say something.
“Dillon, I know you feel guilty, and I understand why. But what if that bullet had gone wide? What if that little girl had been the one who’d been hit, instead of you?” She shook her head, holding my hand tightly. “There’s no reason why you need to feel guilty for him doing his job. You’d have done the same thing, I’m sure.”
“None of that changes the fact that he’s the one who’s dead, and I’m the one who’s still here,” I said, pulling my hand away. I tried to shove down the feelings that were mounting and overwhelming me. I didn’t want to say something that would hurt her or make her think that I was ungrateful for anything she’d said to me. I turned to look back at her, and her face looked clearly torn, as if she was wrestling with something. Whatever it was, I just hoped she’d be able to get it off her chest. I hoped she’d know that she could trust me enough—
“And I’m glad you’re still here. Because, Dillon, I’m pregnant.”
The bottom could’ve dropped out of the world and I wouldn’t have noticed. Everything seemed to have slowed down and speed up simultaneously, and my hands felt like they’d started to sweat. I wasn’t going to insult her by asking if it was mine; she’d been at my house for more than a month.
“What—Macy—” I leaned forward, putting my head into my hands. I took another few deep breaths before turning back to her. “Why did you keep this from me?”
She stood up, turning away from me, and I heard her voice thin out. “Because whatever I might feel for you, Dillon, and whatever you might’ve done for me, I don’t know you that well. I don’t know whether I can actually trust you. I knew Alex for years before we got engaged, and he never once abused me before that. I’ve known you for less than two months, and you might’ve been trying to protect me, but you were also being controlling at times.”
I didn’t know how to respond. I knew why she’d kept it from me.
“Now, I know that you wouldn’t do that. I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, more than I can say. But the truth is that we still don’t know each other, and now, we don’t have to be in this situation. I’ll go back to my apartment and see what I can recover, and maybe we can talk more as things go on.”
I didn’t say anything. She’d had so many choices taken from her and so many events dictated to her that I didn’t know how to ask her to stay.
She went back into the house, leaving me on the porch in silence.
28
MACY
I was shaking when I went back into the cabin after my conversation with Dillon, unable to control my hands as I went to our room and sat down on the bed.
Maybe I shouldn’t have told him in that way, coming out as baldly as that, but I just hadn’t been able to hold back any longer after he’d told me everything he’d been holding back.
I’d figured that his story would be something like what he’d told me; there was nothing quite like guilt to work on you and compound your trauma into something even greater than what it needed to be. I knew that better than anyone. And if that guilt was allowed to fester and build, to become a living weapon inside you… well. It was no wonder he hadn’t let anyone close in over two years.
I knew he knew that this was his opportunity to step up and step forward. And I also knew we both understood the opportunity that sat before us. There was a very real potential for love here, and it was up to us to seize it, if we felt so inclined.
There was only one thing to do, and it was a risk… but there was nothing else I could think of. I wasn’t willing to give up on him—on us—that easily.
I put on my shoes and headed out to the living room, looking out at the porch. He was still sitting there, staring out at the forest the way I had been half an hour before. My abandoned breakfast was sitting on the bench next to him.
Fine. I would be able to take advantage of this time while he was distracted to get what I needed before I asked him to help me enact the last part of my plan. Shuffling through the papers on his desk, it wasn’t long before I found what I was looking for and quickly pocketed it before I reached into his desk and pulled out his second phone, which I also pocketed.