Never Fall for the Fake Boyfriend (Never Say Never #3) Read Online Lauren Landish

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Funny Tags Authors: Series: Never Say Never Series by Lauren Landish
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Total pages in book: 120
Estimated words: 111742 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 559(@200wpm)___ 447(@250wpm)___ 372(@300wpm)
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She laughs like that’s ridiculous. Like Dad, Jessica prefers her humor dipped in plaster and written in stone, to forever be humorous. To her, at least.

Cole does something I’ve never been able to do—shut Jessica up. He wraps one of my ringlets around his finger, tugging gently. “I love Janey’s hair. It’s different and beautiful, not boring, plain brown.” He sounds wistful about my hair, all the while, insulting Jessica’s brown tresses.

Ooh, he’s a slick one. Shutting down Dad about my cooking and Jessica with her annoying nickname.

I’m secretly thrilled and have to shift from one foot to the other to keep from doing a happy dance.

“Who’re you?” Jessica asks with narrowed eyes.

“Cole, Janey’s boyfriend,” he answers proudly, forcibly dragging his attention away from me to glance at her. He doesn’t bother asking who she is, and I can see that it irks Jessica.

I’m going to hell for it, but I’m glad Cole’s here, playing the part of my boyfriend. Just seeing the looks on all their faces makes whatever eternal damnation I’ll suffer worth it.

“Oh, there’s Paisley,” Mom says in a hushed voice like we’re not all here to see her. And she’s off on the topic of the day. Not meeting my boyfriend for the first time, of course. That’s small potatoes.

The wedding, though? That’s important.

“I haven’t seen her dress yet, but you know it’s going to be gorgeous. Paisley wouldn’t have it any other way.” Mom nods, certain of that. “They went into town and tried on dozens of them before she picked one, but it’s been all hush-hush, top secret.”

She looks left and right like someone might overhear her gossiping. “I hope she picked a white one, at least. Wedding dresses should be white . . . and lacy . . . and elegant.” She’s obviously given this a lot of thought. “You know, kids these days are getting married in pink dresses? And black ones? I saw it on a TV show and thought ‘that’s not a wedding dress’, but I guess if that’s what she wants . . .” She trails off, shrugging like it’s none of her business seconds after judging an entire industry. Mom’s a traditionalist, to say the least.

“Well, Paisley’ll look beautiful, I’m sure,” Dad comments, on Mom’s side no matter what. She could say that the moon’s made of dried Oreo filling and he’d nod agreeably.

“They’re having the ceremony at that event center,” Mom says as she starts rehashing everything she knows about the impending nuptials.

“I’m a junior bridesmaid. Can you believe that shit?” Jessica sneers when Mom pauses to take a breath. She somehow manages to make it sound like a brag that she’s more than me, but at the same time, completely beneath her to be a ‘junior’ anything.

“Jessica, please watch your language. Young ladies don’t speak like that,” Mom corrects her gently.

If I’d cursed when I was thirteen, especially in a fancy restaurant, I would’ve been grounded for life. Not that I would’ve dared to say that . . . well, not where Mom could hear. But Jessica? She curses loud, proud, and with no care and is barely reprimanded. Somehow, that’s supposed to be one of those ‘mistakes’ they’re correcting with her.

Jessica rolls her eyes at the admonishment. “Whatever. It’s stupid that I’m not a regular bridesmaid. It’s not like I’m a child.”

“Beg to differ,” I mutter under my breath, thinking no one will hear me. Or listen.

But Mom does.

“Janey!” she hisses. “Be nice to your sister. Her feelings are a little hurt is all. She’s sensitive, you know.”

She’s sensitive. Jessica? The Menace is sensitive?

Meanwhile, Jessica’s grinning like the Cheshire Cat at having gotten away with her rudeness.

“Everyone, please sit down. Dinner is served,” Uncle Teddy announces formally. He’s wearing a button-up shirt and bolo tie, black slacks, and boat shoes. An odd combination of not-formal attire, but for him, it’s pretty razzle-dazzle. Uncle Teddy’s probably one of my favorite people in my family, mostly because he used to give us as many Otter Pops as we wanted and made sure I got my favorite purple ones every time. That was partially because Paisley wanted the red ones so she could pretend they were lipstick, but still, at least I got my favorite too.

What can I say, my standards for favorite are pretty low in my family. All it takes is a popsicle and you’re it.

Next to him stands Aunt Glenda. She’s wearing a gold gown that looks more wedding-like than dinner-like, but she looks really pretty in it.

And then there’s Paisley and Max.

Paisley is wearing a white satin nightgown-type dress with a draped neckline that shows her thin frame. Her hair is curled and pulled up around her face with rhinestone clips, and she looks deliriously happy. Her fiancé, Max, is wearing a black suit, a white dress shirt, and a blue tie.


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