Total pages in book: 119
Estimated words: 114284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 571(@200wpm)___ 457(@250wpm)___ 381(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 114284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 571(@200wpm)___ 457(@250wpm)___ 381(@300wpm)
Jeez, he sure had no problem seeing me with others.
I was still conflicted about that.
“We did, in fact, sleep together.” I brushed a hand over my mouth, torn between smiling like a fool at the memories and…being bothered by Macklin’s openness.
He cursed. “That’s so hot. Holy fuck—talk about a new fantasy coming true. Are you working today or…? I wanna see you and get all the details.”
At least he wanted to see me.
I cleared my throat. “Actually, Ty and I are going to catch an early movie and spend the day together, but I need to stop by my hotel to grab new clothes, so we could meet up before Ty and I go out to dinner…?”
“Oh. So it’s like…a date thing?”
I cocked my head, wondering if I was imagining how his tone changed to something more uncertain.
“I think so—yes. I’m very fond of him. I can’t quite describe why, but…” I shook my head. None of that mattered if Macklin wasn’t comfortable. There was a reason I wanted to talk to my boy before the movie. Primaries came first. “You have to tell me if you’re not okay with this, sweetheart. I can postpone my plans—or cancel, for that matter—if you’d like to sit down and talk first.”
Admittedly, I wanted him to ask me to postpone. This brand-new thing between Ty and me was taking off so fast, and I wasn’t even talking about the physical attraction. It was my sudden urge to know everything about him. To be near him.
“No—hell no, I’m fine with it,” Macklin said firmly. I kinda just deflated. He really didn’t care, did he? “It just caught me off guard, is all. You haven’t really been known to connect with people easily.”
I still wasn’t. That was why I was so rattled by my attraction to Ty, and I told Macklin as much. I wanted to be honest. This was rare for me.
“Even more so because we’re both interested in something vanilla,” I added. And I had to chuckle. The whole thing was bizarre. “I can’t remember the last time I wanted something outside of kink.”
Macklin chuckled too, but it sounded forced.
It was fucking me up. For decades, I’d prided myself on understanding human behavior. I’d studied it at college. I’d burned to identify signs and cues and reactions. But because of my fractured past with Macklin, I doubted myself now. When my brain screamed at me to acknowledge that something was wrong with Macklin, another part of me was more resigned to listen to what he said, not how he said it. We’d promised each other to be brutally honest.
So, was he lying to me?
“All the more reason to explore that with Ty,” he told me quietly. “I should go get ready for work, but I’ll see you tomorrow for lunch, right?”
Something was definitely wrong.
I suppressed a sigh and stared down at the snow-covered pavement. “Of course.” I cleared my throat again and felt…just off. All the insecurities were rushing back, shaking the very foundation we were supposed to reinforce.
“Okay, good. I love you.” He was putting on a front. I heard the fake cheerfulness so clearly.
“Love you too.” I ended the call and clenched my jaw at the harsh winds. My mind spun out of control, but what the fuck could I do?
Either Macklin was lying to me, or he truly was fine with me being with Ty. In which case, I would have to come to terms with him being more naturally open-minded than I was. We would likely have a future with more playtime including other men than I was comfortable with.
I returned inside in a shitty mood, with a rock the size of Mount Rushmore in the pit of my stomach, and I couldn’t hide that to save my life. Ty noticed the change as soon as I sat down again.
“That wasn’t a happy call,” he noted.
I sighed and unzipped my jacket. The heat felt nice. Small favors and all. “Two calls, technically. But I’m gonna leave Lane to you. He’s ending his D/s dynamic with Macklin today—not their relationship, just the D/s component. He wanted to give me a heads-up.”
“All right.” Ty shifted in his seat, visibly confused.
Who could blame him? The boys’ D/s arrangement had begun and ended after we’d left Ty’s house.
“Then Macklin called,” I stated. “I probably shouldn’t bore you with that bullshit, because it’ll surely send you runnin’. I’m not ready for that.” I found his hand under the table and squeezed it.
He offered half a smirk and squeezed back. “Or…we can be each other’s sounding boards. Judging by last night, we both need one.”
See, it didn’t take more than that to reel me in. I needed comfort too—comfort and reassurance—and it felt equally wonderful and wrong that I would have to turn to Ty for that. But I took what I could, and I ended up ranting. Frustrated, tired, wary, irritated—I went through every emotion, it seemed, as I relayed the conversation with Macklin to Ty.