Total pages in book: 75
Estimated words: 75519 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 302(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75519 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 302(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
Alone again.
Fourteen
Paige
Iblinked, and I was standing outside on the balcony of the resort. The orchestra was still playing in the distance from inside. I couldn’t remember the last time I just stood still, appreciating a scenic view.
The refuge I sought was nowhere to be found under the full moon dancing off the buildings. Only darkness surrounded me like the sadness reflecting off my soul at the moment. I watched the wind blow the trees for I don’t know how long, letting my mind wander to a time when I was his.
I didn’t want to play these games with him, not then, not now, not ever. I hated how he was still able to elicit emotions I thought were long since buried. I was the one who started dancing with that man to get a rise out of him. I didn’t expect to screw myself in the process. I knew he was just dancing with her to show me a taste of my own medicine. That wasn’t what bothered me the most, it was that I wanted to be the woman he was dancing with.
Watching Adrian all night was quite a show. The power he exuded. The way women were openly gawking at him. He truly was the king of the jungle.
Suddenly feeling him behind me, I couldn’t turn to face him in that moment. It was too difficult. The overwhelming sentiments I still had for him were too heavy a burden to endure.
Shaking off the unrelenting emotion he evoked from deep within my body, I opened my mouth to say something.
Anything.
But there was only silence.
He was the first to close the distance between us, merely adding to the internal battle that surfaced in the forefront of my mind. It was a whirlwind of sensations.
From my mind.
To my heart.
To every bone in my body.
I looked down at the ground when his looming presence behind me was too much to bear. My breathing hitched, but I stayed firmly in the place I was standing.
I didn’t move; glued in place.
It seemed like I was barely breathing.
In a moment where I felt completely vulnerable and exposed, I shared the only thing I could…
Silently praying.
Hoping.
He’d leave me alone.
But why did that feel so wrong when it was supposed to be right?
He was shattering my revolve like I didn’t have one anymore. I hated feeling this way, giving him all the power.
“You have no idea what it’s like having to work for you. To see you every day, pretending like you didn’t break my heart and stomp all over it.” I paused, clearing my throat. Pitifully resisting my emotions from getting the best of me. “I didn’t just lose you, Adrian. I lost Cade too. I had no one left because you took it all away from me.” Tears rimmed my eyes. There was no controlling them while they slid down my face.
“You two were all I had. I thought… I just imagined a life with you. One where we could finally be together out in public. Where you’d come home to me every night to kiss me and tell me you love me. I thought we had a future together. One that included marriage and having your babies…” I hesitated, breathing in a deep and sturdy breath.
Contemplating my next words, I debated if he deserved to know the truth and what he put me through.
I protectively wrapped my arms around my stomach in a comforting gesture, desperately trying to hold in the memories that threatened to spill. I knew he noticed. There was no way he couldn’t feel the effect he always had over me.
Thinking about the past and the future I imagined we’d have, I closed my eyes, waiting the unknown and the inevitable to be spoken. He felt my hesitancy to expose my truths. They seared into his skin with each passing second.
Although we weren’t even touching, I knew he could still feel me all over. It was calming and disturbing in ways I never expected for both of us.
“You know that’s what I wanted, right? What I’ve always wanted since I was a teenager. To marry you. To have your babies. To have a family and grow old with you. I never had that, and I thought you’d be the man to give it to me.”
He didn’t falter. “I can give you that now.”
I grimaced with big, huge, ugly tears falling down the sides of my face. I was hanging on by a very thin thread.
“It’s so easy for you. You know that, don’t you? I mean you know everything about me. Did your PI tell you how much I cry at night? Feeling lonely? Scared? Broken?”
“For fuck’s sake, Paige. What was I supposed to do? It was you or my brother.”
My body trembled as I spun to stare profoundly into his eyes. His willpower matched mine.