Total pages in book: 84
Estimated words: 81150 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 406(@200wpm)___ 325(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81150 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 406(@200wpm)___ 325(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
“I’m sorry,” he heard from behind him and turned to Olivia, who was working with him today. “I don’t understand why people act the way they do, why they don’t think before they speak.”
He shrugged because there wasn’t much they could do about it; they couldn’t change other people. “Thanks. I’m sure it’ll ease up.” He hoped.
“You’re the best kinda man, Deacon Sharpe. I hope you know that.” Olivia smiled. She was a reminder of why he loved Briar County so damn much.
“I appreciate that.”
They were slow, it was cold out, and Deacon hadn’t scheduled himself a full shift. Before Grady, he would have stayed, but today he left on time and headed out to Harmony.
He didn’t feel like being home, and Granny was with his mom and sister. While they’d welcome him and he appreciated the shit out of his family—even his dad, brother-in-law, and sister-in-law were coming around more where Grady was concerned—it wasn’t them he wanted to be with right then.
He figured the two of them could grab a bite to eat in Harmony when Grady got off work. He’d spent the morning helping Holden finish up a job, then the afternoon at the store.
The ride to Harmony was quick. When Deacon arrived, he saw Roe stacking bags of feed on a pallet.
Roe looked up and, when he caught Deacon’s eye, gave him a wide smile. “Hey, man. How’s it going?”
“Not bad. Just needed to get out of Everett for a bit. I know Grady’s supposed to be getting off work soon.”
“How’s it been?” Roe asked softly. “I wanted to reach out but didn’t want to overstep.”
Deacon’s gaze darted around. They were off to the far-right corner of the store, alone. “Could be better. Could be worse too. If it wasn’t for everyone else, it’d be damn near perfect.”
“Your family?”
“They’re good. Dad’s having a little harder time wrapping his head around it than the others, but it’s already getting better, and he’s not walking away.”
“What about you? It’s been an…unexpected few months.”
Deacon gave a humorless chuckle. “You can say that again.” He hesitated, looked around again to make sure they were still alone. “I didn’t see him coming, that’s for sure; didn’t see any of this coming, but I just…don’t know, really. I haven’t had a hard time accepting it, even though it’s not something I’d considered for myself. It just is, and it feels right. I trust my gut, always have, and this is where it led me. It was only ever Patty for me before. Never really wanted anyone before or after her until him.”
Over the past month, he’d spent time online researching demisexual and other sexualities he hadn’t even known existed. It was all still somewhat confusing. He’d grown up to automatically think in terms of straight, then later straight or gay, but there was a whole lot more out there.
In some ways, he felt like he could be on the ace spectrum. While he enjoyed sex with Grady, and he’d enjoyed it with his wife as well, it wasn’t something he craved all that often. Intimacy and being close to the person he cared about? Hell yeah. He wanted that all the time. Sex, on the other hand, sometimes he wanted and sometimes he didn’t. But then, he figured most people could say that, so he didn’t know if that meant he was ace or not. Most of the time he didn’t think it mattered at all. He was who he was, and he wouldn’t change. Other times he thought he wanted to know just so he could put a name to it.
Like most things in life, there were no clear-cut definitions. It was different for everyone; life was full of all the shades of gray.
The demisexual thing fit best, and though Deacon had yet to voice it out loud and was unsure if he ever wanted or needed to, he thought it described him pretty well. He’d been sexually attracted to two people in his life, and he loved them both.
“You’re happy. That’s the most important thing,” Roe told him, pulling him out of his thoughts. “I’ve learned that, in my life, to grab my happiness where I can. It’s how I ended up with Wyatt and how I got Holden.”
“Thanks, man.”
There were footsteps down one of the aisles beside them, and then Grady came around the corner, clearly not having expected to see him. “Hey. What are you doing here?”
“Don’t know, really.” He shrugged. “Came to see you, I guess.”
“Well, it’s a nice surprise.” Grady smiled, went to reach for him, but stopped himself like he wasn’t sure if he should.
“You should hang around here, Deke,” Roe told him. “Grady and I get off in about an hour, and then the two of you can have dinner at the house with me and Holden. He’s there now, so if you prefer, you could head over,” Roe offered.