Total pages in book: 47
Estimated words: 42863 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 214(@200wpm)___ 171(@250wpm)___ 143(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 42863 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 214(@200wpm)___ 171(@250wpm)___ 143(@300wpm)
They sold me. They earned money off me.
I should have been surprised. I should have been angry. Upset.
Something.
Instead, I just felt… numb. Empty. Hollow. Like something in me had completely shut off to protect myself. To keep my mind from just… snapping.
“I shouldn’t have left you,” Beck croaked from the end of the hall, making me turn to look at him. His chest was bare, only a towel wrapped around his waist. I could hear the shower running from our bathroom, but he obviously hadn’t used it yet. “I failed you, Clarke, and I’m so goddamn sorry. So fucking sorry, baby.”
I shook my head, blinking at him. “Why? It’s not your fault our parents are shitty and value money over a human life.”
Beck stepped a little further into the room, frowning at me, concern seeping into his eyes. “Clarke, are you okay?”
I nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.” It wasn’t a lie. I was. A little empty at the moment, but I was okay. I didn’t feel like bursting into tears. Didn’t feel like I was going to fall apart.
“She’s fine,” Tank assured him, his hand still cupping my cheek, his fingers still in my hair. “Go on and take your shower, baby boy. I’ve got her.”
Beck sighed, his shoulders slumping a little before he nodded and disappeared back down the hall. But this time, I didn’t hear the door shut, and I could still hear the shower.
Tank turned my head to face him, running his eyes over my features. “Feeling a bit numb, little one?”
I frowned at him. “How’d you know?”
Tank gave me a tiny smile. “Because I’ve been in your shoes, Clarke,” he said softly. “For the first fifteen years of my life, I endured what you have for the past few months. Becoming numb… it’s your mind’s way of keeping you from breaking. Over time, you’ll be able to cope with what happened to you in a healthy way, but right now, what you’re feeling is okay. It’s normal, even.”
“Ash, I’m so sorry,” I whispered, my heart breaking for him. I cupped his face in my hands, stroking my fingertips along the top of his stubble. “Fifteen years?” I’d only been trapped in that hell for a few months. I wouldn’t have managed years.
He nodded. “Yeah, little one. Fifteen years.”
My lips trembled, tears burning in my eyes. “Ash—” I croaked.
He shook his head before turning to press a kiss to my palm. I drew in a shaky breath when he let his eyes meet mine again. “We’re not doing that, little one. No tears for me, you hear me? I’m okay. I’ve healed, and for me, it was a long time ago.” Leaning forward, he pressed his lips to mine in a soft, chaste kiss. “I need to make all of us something to eat. Will you be okay?”
I nodded. “I’ll be okay,” I promised him. “I’m going to take a shower with Beck.” Standing from his lap, I blew out a soft breath. “I think he needs someone.”
Tank reached out to gently squeeze my hip before he stood to his feet. “You both do, little one.” He pressed a kiss to my temple before heading into the kitchen. I headed for our bedroom and quickly stripped out of my clothes before padding naked into the bathroom.
Beck had his hands pressed to the shower wall and was leaning forward, his head hanging between his arms as the water beat down on his skin. I quietly slipped in before wrapping my arms around his waist. When I pressed my cheek to his back, he dropped a hand from the wall and pressed it over mine, a shuddered breath ripping from his lungs.
“I can’t believe—” his words broke off, pain in his voice. “God, Clarke…” He turned in my arms before holding my face between his palms, so much pain for me—for everything we’d gone through—in his eyes. “I love you, baby, and I’m so fucking sorry they hurt you like that.”
I leaned forward and rested my head on his chest. He dropped his hands to wrap his arms around me, squeezing me to him.
“I’m numb to it right now,” I warned him, “but Ash said that’s okay, and that it’s normal.” I lifted my head, tilting it back to look up at him. “But when I inevitably fall apart over this—”
“I’ll be right there to hold every piece of you in my hands,” he promised, his voice raspy. I swallowed thickly when he pressed his forehead to mine, our eyes locked together. “I swear to you, I will, Clarke.”
That was all I needed. So long as I had him—and Ash—I would be okay. Always.
18
Clarke
A hand slammed over my mouth, and my eyes snapped open, fear churning in my gut. The bitter taste of leather erupted over my tastebuds when I opened my mouth to scream, even though I knew it’d be muted and more than likely a waste of my breath. But I wasn’t even able to get the full sound out before the back of my attacker’s hand smacked against my face so hard, black spots danced across my vision, momentarily stunning me.