Total pages in book: 58
Estimated words: 56680 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 283(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56680 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 283(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
I drum my fingers against the steering wheel, watching the car.
I’m almost at Colt’s house, Mia texts me. I’m sorry we had to leave things like that. Please tell me you’ve got this phone switched on this time.
It’s on, I type, looking between the phone and the car. I won’t miss the chance to talk to you, especially since I can’t see you, my pinup princess.
That was wild, wasn’t it? But I did my best.
You stood up to him, I tell her. You should be proud. It wasn’t easy for you, but you did it.
I can’t believe he thought I would go with him after that, she replies. Actually, I sort of can because that’s the Mia he knows. Before I came here, I had friends. I was confident, but it was all fake. Being away from him, meeting Lexi, and meeting you has made it seem more real. Does that make any sense?
I have to remind myself to look across the street at the car. Her words are hammering into me so hard. Yes, it does. I feel more alive in the last couple of days than I have in a long time. What were you going to say before? At the car? When you told me about your childhood?
I thought you forgot about that, she texts me.
My chest tightens when I think about how she looked in the street, her pain written across her face like she was going to break down into tiny, terrified pieces.
I was going to ask you if it made you want me any less. In hindsight, I think that’s a sick question.
Because the answer’s obvious, I type quickly. I want you for you, Mia. I’d never judge you for something that happened to you. Never.
I just wish I’d been there every time something bad had almost happened to my woman. I wish I could reshape the world so I’d been at the right places at the right times, ready to fight that bastard away, ready to save my woman. There’s so much unfairness in this world.
Which is why I have to remind myself…
No kids, no marriage, no future. So what are we doing, then? Am I just going to take her virginity and then leave her? I could never do that.
I’m going to hang with Lexi for a bit. I think she needs a debriefing.
Okay, Mia. I’m going to see Ma.
I stare across the street, grinding my teeth, thinking of all the darkness and sickness in the world. It started the first time I heard my ma whimpering in pain. I was just a kid. What the hell was I supposed to do? I kept hearing it over the years. Then I told him once, told him to stop, and he thought he was tough, coming at me and beating up a kid.
So I snapped. I saw murder and at the end…
Am I sick? For feeling powerful? For feeling in the right, for once?
Say hi from me if you can.
I can say hi from “Amelia.” That’s the name I gave her. I hope that’s okay.
I blink and rub my eyes. My thoughts keep dragging toward the past. It’s like Mia has unlocked me. It’s not just a joke. Do I really think pain can make the world a better place? But love seemed like a joke before. Mia. Love?
Amelia… Sure, I like it… for now.
I have to push the car door open and walk onto the street. I lean against the car, facing away from the lodging house, wiping the sweat from my head. Somebody hurt her. My Mia. My woman. Somebody hurt her.
“Are you okay, mister?”
I turn to find a little boy standing there. Maybe he’s around eight or nine or ten, wearing a T-shirt with a superhero on it. His mom has her back turned, unloading groceries into the car.
“Jimmy, leave him alone.” The lady looks at me. “Sorry.”
Something about it almost makes me crack up. For a split second, I imagine that the kid is mine. I’ve got a child, and I’m a father. Mia and I have made something beautiful and innocent. Then, somehow, in some way, the world would make us pay for it—a hammer to the head with twisted-up feelings.
“It’s fine,” I say, making my tone calm.
The woman smiles tightly, and the kid keeps staring. There’s no judgment there, just curiosity.
This dinner will have to wait, but you deserve a date. I’ll take you someplace in secret. This war can’t stop us.
Isn’t it too risky? What if Leo finds out? What about your ma?
Guilt touches me, but I can’t lie to her. You’re worth the risks.
I don’t think I can let you do that, she replies. I saw how badly you wanted to hurt Dad. You stopped yourself, and I bet I know why—your mom.
If she weren’t so sick and had somebody else to take care of her, I would have done it, I tell her. She’s hit it on the truth so hard. Then I would’ve lost you, too.