Total pages in book: 58
Estimated words: 56680 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 283(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56680 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 283(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
He leans against the window. I’m speaking at him aggressively, and it deflates him. He knows how pathetically powerless he is. He knows I’m just saying empty words. He knows that the hurting-Mia rule damn well includes him, too.
“When do I get in the trunk?” he whispers, sounding pathetic and defeated.
This is where the darkness comes in. This is where it drills into me and makes me question if I’m a bad man. I’m enjoying this too much because I know what sort of person he was before. Puffed-up and intimidating, staring down at a child.
“Soon,” I tell him gruffly.
He shivers. “Dante, man, please. I know how this ends.”
“Then you should try to fight me,” I tell him. “If you think I’m going to do something, don’t just sit there. Don’t just let it happen. Fight, Ritchie. Prove you can be tough with men, not just little kids.”
He just keeps staring out of the window.
CHAPTER 21
Mia
I’m looking at a home with Ma, his text reads. She seems to really like it.
How do you feel about it? I reply, tucked up on the armchair, knees to my chest, feeling exhausted after everything that’s happened. It’s not too cold, but Colt has the fire raging. Lexi is holding David on the couch next to me, and Shadow, their big, dark Belgian Malinois, is sprawled out on the rug in front of the fire.
I hated the idea for a long time, but Ma told me once that I needed to stop living for her. It’s a hard idea for me to accept. I think she might be right, though.
I guess you could find something else to live for…
When he doesn’t reply right away, I put the cell phone on the arm of the chair. I fall asleep for an hour or even more, a dreamless, heavy sleep that makes waking up feel like climbing out of a hole. My hand immediately darts for my cell phone. No texts.
Lexi watches me with a coy smile. The fire dances in her green-blue eyes.
“What are you smirking at? Have you been sitting there the whole time?”
“It’s peaceful.” She smiles down at David. “Thinking any more about that secret date?”
“Ha, ha,” I mutter, rolling my eyes. “You know I’ve been kidnapped. I saw a man…” I look at David, his precious little body. “D-I-E. This is serious.”
“I’m sorry, Mia,” Lexi says. “I know it is. I’m just… You’re right. We don’t need to talk about that. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“Don’t get all pregnancy hormonal on me now. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap.”
“But you’re right. You’ve been through so much.”
Yet the only thing I can think about is the idea of going to sleep tonight without Dante’s arms wrapped around me. I never knew I’d feel comfortable in the arms of a man or trust him enough. With Dante, I don’t have to wonder, doubt, or second-guess myself. I could just sink against him, feel the heat, feel the connection, then sleep like I never have before.
“I miss him,” I admit.
“You always will,” Lexi says.
“Always.” I shake my head. “Don’t start with that Elio-Scarlet, Luca-Ruby, Colt-and-freaking-Lexi talk.”
She rocks David side to side, smiling. “Okay, fair enough. What do you want for dinner this evening?”
Dante. That’s the answer that comes to me first.
“Whatever you want,” I tell her.
“Do you want to do some painting?” she says. “I think we’ve got some stuff here from last time.”
I did a painting of Lexi when she was nine months pregnant, standing in the garden, more realistic than my usual style. “That was a good painting if I do say so myself.”
“You made me look beautiful.”
“You were more beautiful in real life, hon, believe me.”
“You’re too nice,” she says, laughing.
It’s the truth. There was something radiant and glowing about her. It was like she was swelling with love; as she grew, more love flowed out of her. Until the end, when even her cheeks looked ready to burst with joy. Or is this my deranged artist’s mind going OTT about it because…
Is this what being broody feels like?
“Okay, let’s paint.”
She stands slowly. “Let me put this one down, and then we’ll go.”
After putting David in his crib without crying and getting the baby monitor, we go into the spare room. Lexi leans down, wincing. “Hey…” I touch her arm. “Just show me where it is.”
“See? Pregnancy isn’t all sunshine and rainbows.”
“I never said it was.”
I get the box from under the bed, and then we go down into the back patio, the conservatory area, with the hard floor. Lexi hums a tune as I lay newspapers down, rinsing out a large cup.
“What shall I paint? You again?”
Lexi laughs. “No, I’m not standing there like that again. It was worth it when I was pregnant.”
“It must’ve been way harder!”
“Yeah, but it was worth it.”