Total pages in book: 57
Estimated words: 51803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 259(@200wpm)___ 207(@250wpm)___ 173(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 51803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 259(@200wpm)___ 207(@250wpm)___ 173(@300wpm)
“Could never hate you.” O’Brian swallowed thickly and looked up into Valenti’s eyes. “I love you, babe. Won’t blame you for doin’ what ya gotta do.”
“That’s what this whole assignment has been about -- doing what we have to do. I wish to God we’d never accepted it in the first place,” Valenti said bitterly, turning away again. “But, Sean, I don’t want to do this to you. Not ... not this way.” It was the closest he could come to saying what was in his heart. I don’t want to do this with you out of necessity instead of love. “Don’t want to fuck you this way,” he said at last, unable to meet the sea-green eyes.
“Then don’t,” O’Brian said quietly.
Valenti looked at him. “What do you mean? You’ve just been sitting here telling me how we have no choice. It’s me or the goons; isn’t that right?”
“Don’t fuck me, I mean.” O’Brian looked at him seriously and placed one hand on his partner’s thigh. “Make love to me, babe. We’ve been everything to each other, everything but this. Now we’ll just, well, take the last step.”
Valenti looked at him, speechless. But how do you know we can take that step back once we get out of here? The way he knew O’Brian would want to.
“It doesn’t have to be ugly or hateful,” O’Brian continued earnestly, his hand massaging Valenti’s thigh as he spoke. “It can be a beautiful thing, Valenti. An expression of our friendship. Our partnership. The ultimate.” Sea-green eyes pleaded with him to understand.
The ultimate sacrifice, Valenti thought, looking down at the hand on his thigh. The ultimate expression of friendship, but not love. And when we get out of here, the memory will rip us apart, and then we won’t even have our friendship left. You’ll leave me, Sean; you won’t be able to help it. Because every time you look at me, it won’t be your best friend and partner you see. I’ll be the man you gave it up for -- the man who fucked you. And nothing I can do or say will change that. I’ve lost you, here and now, whether you know it or not. This is the end of the line, pal. It’s all over.
“All right,” he said heavily. “How do you want to do it?” He stood and began rapidly stripping off his clothes until he was as nude as his partner. The mirrored walls reflected back his own dark skin, such a contrast to O’Brian’s pale golden pelt. The images of light and dark mocked him as he stood at the foot of the bed.
“Boy, you’re romantic, aren’t ya?” O’Brian muttered. Lying back on the bed, he looked at Valenti and beckoned him with one hand. “C’mere,” he said at last. Hesitating only briefly, Valenti did. He lay stiffly by his partner’s side until O’Brian curled himself around the longer body and nuzzled into his neck.
“What are you doing?” Valenti asked, his voice breaking just a little as O’Brian’s hand played over his chest, pinching his nipples into awareness.
“Lovin’ you, babe. Wish you’d love me back,” came the breathless whisper, and a hot tongue flicked briefly against the side of his throat, making Valenti catch his breath with tension and need. O’Brian leaned over him then, supporting his weight on one elbow, and came in for a kiss. As his partner’s soft red lips met his and he felt O’Brian’s hot tongue invading his mouth, Valenti knew he was lost. With a groan, he tangled his fingers in the thicket of red-gold hair and pulled O’Brian closer.
“Oh, God, Sean. Wish it didn’t have to be this way,” he whispered when they parted at last, both panting from emotion.
“It is what it is,” his partner answered enigmatically. “Can’t help it now, babe, just gotta go with the flow. So make love with me -- please?”
“You want to get it over with? Is that it?” Valenti asked sadly, looking into the beloved eyes fringed thickly with gold.
“No ... well, I admit it’s a little scary.” O’Brian’s voice dropped a little, and he caressed Valenti’s cheek gently with one finger as he spoke. “But I can’t quite explain. It’s almost like ... I’ve been waitin’ for this ever since we got here. Like it was fate, indelible, ya know?”
“Inevitable,” Valenti corrected automatically with a small, sad smile. “I know. I felt it, too.” And he had. He vividly remembered the deep feeling of unease he’d had ever since they accepted the case. “I knew this would change us forever the first day we got here. Don’t know how, I just knew,” he said, verbalizing the feeling to his partner.
“Nothin’ has to change,” O’Brian insisted. “It’ll still be you and me -- us against them forever, partner. You know that.”
“O’Brian, how can you lie there, getting ready to let me fuck you, and say nothing’s going to change?” Valenti demanded. He rolled them over suddenly so that the weight of his body was pressing the smaller man into the plush mattress, holding his partner’s arms above his head.