Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 77980 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77980 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
It was the second day now, and they’d gotten up early to go fishing. August had rented a small boat, which they took out right after dawn. He’d expected Reese to grumble at having to get up that early, but he hadn’t. He seemed just as eager for this time with August as August was with him.
They found a good spot tucked between massive trees that treated the lake to shade, keeping them cool. Even though it was only seven, he could already feel the humidity thick in the air. It was going to be a hot one.
“I used to want to camp here so bad when I was a kid,” August mused as they sat, poles in the water, Reese sketching the scenery.
“You never got to?” he asked, honest curiosity in the glance he sent August’s way.
“Nah. My dad didn’t really do stuff like that with me, and then he left. It was just me, your grandma, and your aunt. Camping wasn’t really their thing.” Reese would be able to see them when he went back to Orlando. August needed to plan a visit himself.
“And when Grandma remarried, you didn’t get along with him, huh?”
“Nope. He wasn’t very nice.”
“Did you ever go camping with friends?”
“A couple of times with Clint and his family, but not here. When I left Harmony, I didn’t go again until I started going with Pop.”
Reese nodded, looked down at his paper, smudging a line with his finger. “Is that why you’ve always been so good about doing things with me? Because you didn’t have that?” He wasn’t looking at August when he spoke.
“Maybe part of it, sure, but it’s mostly because I enjoy hanging out with you. It’s hard to explain. You’ll see if you become a parent one day, but there’s nothing like spending time with your child. It’s still amazing to me sometimes that I got so lucky, that I get to call you my son.”
Reese rolled his eyes, but August could see a small smile teasing the corners of his lips. “Like I always say, you’re such a dad.”
“Is that a bad thing?” August asked playfully.
“No. Do you… Do you think you wanted to be a dad more than Pop did?”
The question made August’s heart drop deep in his gut. “No. Absolutely not. Your pop and I both wanted you—so, so much. He used to be the one to offer to get up with you in the middle of the night.” Even though Reese had been two when they’d adopted him, he hadn’t had the best living situation before. He’d suffered neglect and been a wild little thing. He hadn’t had any kind of schedule and would climb out of bed at night, unable to sleep. It got to the point where they almost put his bed in their room because they were scared he would get up and hurt himself. “Sometimes I’d wake up too and sneak down the hallway and just watch him. We had this old glider rocking chair, and he would sit in it with you on his chest. You’d fuss for a while, but then you’d fall asleep against him. He looked at you in awe and with so much love. Having you for our son is our greatest joy, Reese. I promise you that.”
He nodded and sketched some more. It was clear to August he still had something on his mind, so August waited him out, let him find the words he was looking for. “But when I got older, do you think it changed? He used to spend so much time at home with us, and then he wasn’t there as much.”
Jesus, this broke his damn heart. He hated that Reese doubted how much he was loved. There was nothing more painful than that. “No, nothing changed with how much he loves you. Pop is different. He doesn’t share his feelings as easily, whereas you and I are all heart and can’t hide that well. That’s not an excuse, though. If you’re hurt or feel like you missed something in any way, your feelings are valid. I think…I think Pop fell out of love with me long before I was willing to admit that things weren’t working. We were wrong for each other, but we both loved you so much and wanted to hold on to our family so much that we ignored the signs that we weren’t happy together. I don’t believe he did it on purpose or even realized what he was doing, but he was gone more because he didn’t want to be with me. It had nothing to do with you.”
Maybe if August would have said something earlier, maybe if they would have separated earlier, things would have been better for Reese.
“Work is more important to Pop than it is to you. Not that you don’t love what you do, but I think he needs it in a different way than you do.”