Total pages in book: 93
Estimated words: 87950 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87950 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
“Whoa, slow down, Mom,” I said, palpitations suddenly clogging my throat. “I’m not sure love will ever be on the cards for me, anyway. When you look at all the women I’ve had…”
“Um, do I need to hear this?” she interrupted, dropping my hands and scrunching up her nose.
“What I mean is, I didn’t feel a connection to a single one of ‘em. Statistically, surely one of them should’ve made a dent in my heart. Unless you count Belle, but looking back I think she affected my di…Wait, you definitely don’t need to hear that.”
“There’s someone out there for everyone, Matthew.”
“You’re single.”
“Mine was your father. No one has been, or will ever be, able to take his place. I wish he’d lived long enough for you to remember him.” She sighed dolefully and so did I. Cancer stole my dad from us when I was eighteen months old. It was hard growing up without him, emotionally and financially, and from being ten years old I was determined to grow up and be successful enough to take care of my mom. I never could’ve dreamed I’d be so successful, but I was able to ensure whatever worries my mom might’ve had, money would never be one of them again.
“How did you know?” I asked, curiosity forcing my eyebrows together. “That Dad was ‘the one?’”
I thought back to Elle and Kip’s wedding, remembering how lonely I felt. Just because I believed I’d never find that kind of bond with someone, didn’t mean it wasn’t something I craved.
“Oh, honey, when you find it, you just…know.”
“But how? I mean I thought I loved Belle, and look how that turned out.”
“When something happens in your day,” she began, tilting her head as she appeared to reminisce. “Big or small, good or bad, they’re the person you can’t wait to tell. They’re the person you can sit in silence with for hours without feeling uncomfortable. The person you can insult but would defend to the ends of the earth if anyone else dared to try. When you see them, hear from them, or even just think about them, they’ll make your heart smile. That’s how you know.”
“Hearts can smile?” I questioned, raising the tone of my voice just enough to sound sarcastic. It earned me a swat to the top of my arm.
“Mock all you like, but believe me, when you feel it, and you will, you’ll remember this conversation and know I was right.”
I wasn’t convinced. I was nearing thirty. I’d slept with an immeasurable number of women. Hell, I’d even proposed to one. Yet I’d never felt any of the things she described. When I had news, Alex was the first person I thought to call.
You’re gonna end up a lonely old man with only your limp, wrinkly dick to keep you company. “We’ll just have to wait and see, I guess.” I brushed her off, changing the subject to a discussion about my pool cleaner not showing up last week.
The topic continued to run silently in the back of mind, however. I hoped that one day I would understand what my mom meant. Sure, life was great now, despite being alone. I had Alex to keep me company, but what would I do when he found the person who made his heart smile? He was the only one of my friends left who hadn’t settled down, who didn’t have a life plan and a future to build with someone else. When he joined the love club too, I’d well and truly have no one.
Fuck.
I was making myself miserable, so I literally shook the depressing thoughts from my head and carried on talking about the pool guy, deciding I would ask Sawyer for the number of the guy he and Jake used.
“I really do need to get going now, honey,” my mom said. I glanced down at my watch and realized I’d kept her behind for almost twenty minutes. “Gather the laundry from your bedroom before I go.”
“Thanks, Mom.” Grinning widely, I jumped up and pecked her on the cheek.
Just then, Alex appeared in fresh clothes, his hair still dripping from the shower. “You should make him wash his own clothes, Mrs. Carter. He needs to learn how to be a big boy.”
“Screw you,” I said, blowing out a chuckle. “Don’t you have work to get to?”
“I’m going, I’m going. I’ll call you if I hear about any bars or premises becoming available.”
Making my way toward the staircase, I fistbumped Alex. “Sure. Thanks, dude.”
Alex scurried over to my mom, pecked her cheek, and then headed out to his car while I went in search of laundry. I picked it up piece by piece before tossing it in the basket. It was the only way I could be sure no rogue panties found their way inside. Again.