Total pages in book: 150
Estimated words: 143633 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 718(@200wpm)___ 575(@250wpm)___ 479(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 143633 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 718(@200wpm)___ 575(@250wpm)___ 479(@300wpm)
I hid under the bedcovers as the world spun around me, feeling more frantic this time. Closer to breaking. Again, maybe it was contrast. Seeing the care in someone’s eyes as they rescued me from the cold, hard floor outside…
Music came on from the living room, and I was sure their second kiss and make up session was underway. Mum would be safe tonight, while Scottie was in the love you for ever mode, but I was still burning up. I must have tossed and turned for hours, still only half asleep when the music turned off. They were laughing together as they passed my bedroom door to get to hers. I sighed as I put my earbuds back in so I couldn’t hear any more from them. The thought of him touching her made me feel sick.
My earbuds must have been the reason I didn’t hear my door open later. I was lying asleep with them still in when I felt the presence of someone in my room. I tugged them out, eyes frantic. The room was dark and quiet, but I could still see him there, standing right next to my bed. The orange light through the curtains made him look even more nasty than usual.
The terror I felt was so intense it was electric. I wanted to scrabble, and bolt, and run, but I couldn’t. He moved before I had the chance to, pinning me down with a hand over my mouth. I could hear his breaths up close. Feel them in my face.
“Don’t even think about screaming,” he said. “It won’t end well for anyone if you do, you get me?”
I nodded in shock under his hand, unsure of what the hell else to do. He took his hand away, and it took everything I had not to screech the place down. I tried to squirm away, but it didn’t work. He had me tight.
“Still think I’m so fucking weak, do you? You even think of taking photos of me and showing them to the police and I’ll fuck you up bad.”
Yeah, it was true. He knew I’d been serious earlier. Something had changed in me.
And changed in him, too…
I stayed silent, twisted up in fear. His breaths were fierce in my face.
“Your mother won’t back you up if it comes to it, you know that? If you try to cause shit, it’s my side she’ll take, not yours.”
“That’s bullshit,” I said, but he laughed a nasty, quiet laugh.
“Like fuck it is. You’d better tone down the shitty attitude, or you’ll get worse than she does. You understand me?”
There were so many things I wanted to shout and scream, but he was deadly serious. He meant it. His words were more ominous than I’d ever known. This wasn’t the throes of rage where things flared up in horrendous arguments, this was cold, calculated. True.
It gave me shivers.
“Good,” he said. “You’ve got the fucking message.”
I gasped but didn’t move as he pulled away and got back to his feet. He stepped backwards without giving a shit for what I might do to him, knowing I was too terrified to do a thing. For Mum’s sake, as well as mine. He was right. Scottie would weave his sick magic with her, and she’d stand by him. She was too delusional to do anything else.
He didn’t close my door behind him, leaving it slightly ajar. I heard a token flush of the toilet to excuse his bedroom exit, and then I heard the mumble of voices as he got back into their room. Mum would have no idea what was happening here, and if I told her… if she knew what he’d just done…
It would go one way or another, and both of them had terrifying outcomes. We’d be dragged down to hell along with him.
I scrabbled for my phone from under the covers, urges pumping to call the police, but what could I tell them? Scottie would deny it, and he’d make me pay, and make Mum pay, too. I could have called Trisha, but she’d stay out of it when it really mattered. She’d rather play ignorant than get caught up in this mess. Jayden wouldn’t condemn his dad. So it was just me, alone in the terror. The rage and panic turned to hurt and tears, and I felt myself breaking, giving up for once in my life. Finally.
My strength left. Years of trying my best to keep myself together and stay strong fell away, and I was the little girl I’d left behind when I was young. I was nothing but a tiny ball of tears under the bedcovers as I realised just how trapped we were in the wheel of abuse.
I laid there awhile, still hiding, shaking, listening to them, laughing, moaning, grunting. The vile piece of shit was fucking her, using and abusing her and there was fuck all I could do about it. There was no way I’d get back to sleep, and he would be there in the morning, playing happy families with Mum, who’d be oblivious. I worked evening shifts on a Sunday, and Scottie wouldn’t be back at the construction yard until early Monday, so I’d be fucked, unable to avoid him. I got another bout of the shivers, because I couldn’t do it. I’d never be able to keep it together in front of him, not after tonight.