Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 84676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 423(@200wpm)___ 339(@250wpm)___ 282(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 423(@200wpm)___ 339(@250wpm)___ 282(@300wpm)
“What?” Worth asks. “Why?”
I let out a half laugh. “I guess because she wants to smooth things over so her father and husband can make money from me.” I scan the message. “She wants to go to dinner.”
“Just the two of you?” Jack asks. “Does she want something… romantic to happen between you?”
“No, me and Jules, her and Grant.”
“A double date!” Jack says. “Not awkward at all.”
“Hang on,” Worth says. “You haven’t answered my question about how it was seeing her. Are you hoping to rekindle something?”
I snap my head up. He can’t be serious. I’ve spent more than a decade hating this woman. “Absolutely not. She’s married. And I think she’s a terrible human.”
“Are you protesting too much?” Jack asks.
“No. I don’t find her attractive. She makes me…” I shift uncomfortably in my seat. “She makes me itch.” There’s something too effortful about her. I can see now that no one gets to see the real Caroline Hammond. Maybe she’s not even aware of who she is deep down inside. “I don’t have feelings for her.”
“So, you’re not still in love with Caroline,” Worth says. “Seeing her makes you itch. Why are you arriving unexpectedly on my doorstep in a mood like you’ve just murdered someone?”
I shrug and take another swig of my beer.
Worth and Jack don’t have the decency to change the topic. Instead, I feel their eyes boring into me, waiting patiently for me to stop evading their questions.
“I just wanted to get out of the flat, that’s all.” Still, they don’t say anything. “Because Jules is moving out.”
“Ahhh,” Worth says. Jack exhales like they’ve finally discovered the missing piece of the puzzle. Maybe they have.
“And you don’t want her to?” Worth asks.
I think about it. “I’ve liked having her there. She was fun.”
“And you like having sex with her.”
Of course I like having sex with her. What a stupid question. “She kinda told me she was using me.”
“What?” Jack asks. “Did you two fight?”
I shake my head and slide the beer bottle on the table between my hands. “Nope. She packed up and left. A couple of days ago she said that everyone uses everyone else and that nothing is real. I guess this is the natural conclusion of our arrangement.”
I glance up and Jack looks confused. “She doesn’t really strike me as that kind of woman. What was the context?”
“We were talking about Caroline. She said I was only pissed off with Caroline using me because I didn’t get what I wanted from her.”
“Which was?”
“Her to love me, I guess.”
“Right,” Worth says. “And then Jules said she was using you?”
I nod and take another sip of beer, hoping it will ease the rawness in my throat. “For the job at The Mayfair. And I was using her to act like I had a fiancée.”
“Well, that’s true,” Jack says.
“I guess.” Except to me, it didn’t feel like the trade she made it out to be.
“You guess?” Jack says. “That was your deal, wasn’t it? She gets to be manager if you get a fiancée.”
“Right,” I reply. I feel like such a dick.
“Only, the edges started to blur,” Worth says. I can feel him looking for confirmation in my expression.
“Edges?” Jack asks.
Worth sighs. “Between what was in the pact—what was a trade-off or a payment, if you like—and what was real.”
“I’m missing something,” Jack says. “It was all real. She really did pretend to be your fiancée and she really is the manager of The Mayfair.”
“Yes,” Worth says. “But they also really became friends and lovers. Our friend Leo here caught feelings along the way and doesn’t know what to do about it.”
“Ahhh,” Jack says. “I get it. So, have you told Jules you like her and want things to continue between you?”
“No,” I snap. I’d bloody tried. Or at least I suggested she delay her move-out so we could make time to have dinner and talk.
“He doesn’t want a repeat performance of what happened with Caroline when he thought the feelings between them were mutual and found out they weren’t.”
“I don’t even need to be here for this psycho-drama,” I reply, looking between my friends. “You two can play it out all by yourselves.”
“But Jules isn’t Caroline,” Jack says, like I’m not even here. “And you’re not eighteen anymore. You’ve got a better read on people.”
I shrug. “It doesn’t matter anyway. Life goes on.”
“Well, it clearly does matter because you’re miserable,” Worth says.
“Oh don’t worry,” Jack says. “It will only last a decade or so and he’ll get over it.”
He’s obviously comparing Caroline dumping me with Jules leaving, but the two events are incomparable. Jules is more important in so many ways than Caroline ever was. That wasn’t clear to me until the awards ceremony, when I realized Caroline didn’t have the impact or power I thought she did on me. Caroline hurt my ego. Jules has ripped out my heart.