Total pages in book: 81
Estimated words: 74730 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 374(@200wpm)___ 299(@250wpm)___ 249(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 74730 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 374(@200wpm)___ 299(@250wpm)___ 249(@300wpm)
I’d heard that a time or twenty, but something in his expression gave me pause, the vulnerable cast to his eyes or maybe the way his pink tongue darted out to lick at his lower lip. I gentled my voice. “Want to explain?”
“So you can judge me harder?” He gave me the pointed look I surely deserved. He didn’t know my history.
“Sorry.” I moved behind him to lay a hand on his bare shoulder. “I came off harsher than intended there. Partly because I’ve been burned before. And partly because I was shocked. You let me fuck your face like a veteran porn star.”
“Uh. Thanks.” Sean made a choking sound that turned into a laugh of sorts. His shoulder was warm under my hand, and I took my sweet time moving away. Turning his head, he offered me an impish smile that played off his pink cheeks. “And I’ve watched enough porn. Maybe that’s why I was good at it.”
I guffawed loudly at that. “If porn watching could make people better at sex, there would be a lot less bad sex in this world.”
“True.” Sean shrugged. “Maybe the fact I liked it so much counted for something?”
“Definitely.” I couldn’t help but smile at the memory of how damn amazing that orgasm had been. Top ten of all time, for sure, but I wasn’t liking the awkward afterglow nearly as much. “But if you liked it so much, why wait until you were…what? Forty-one?”
“Forty-three. And like you, I’m not a cheater. I was married to a woman for over two decades. I took our vows seriously.” Sean’s tone was conversational but firm. “She was one of my best friends. Even if she would have been okay with me screwing around on the side, I wasn’t going to step out on her or the kids. That’s not who I am.”
My eyebrows lifted. “She wouldn’t have minded?”
“She implied as much a few times. Maxine is an academic-minded climate scientist who’d rather be analyzing snow samples than making bedroom magic.” Sean’s tone was fond, and he gave an almost wistful shake of his head. “We were the classic high-school couple of valedictorian good girl and second-string football player. Our families went to the same church, and our dating felt predestined. Not many sparks, but a deep friendship. We always could talk about anything.”
“Talking is good.” I said the words, but I tended to go for sparks. I wasn’t one for deep conversations. Sean’s chatty nature was both infectious and unnerving, the way I wanted him to keep going rather than herding him out of my apartment. “So you were high-school sweethearts?”
“Yup. Predictably went all the way on senior prom night. Had sporadic sex over the next year. Got pregnant with Declan despite using protection.”
“That happens.” Not to me, but the way Sean’s mouth twisted said he still had unresolved feelings about the decades-old surprise. “So you got married?”
“Tale as old as time.” Done toweling off, he pulled back on his jeans. “Got married. Conceived Bridget in a sleep-deprived act neither of us remembered until the two pink lines showed up.”
I blinked at that. “Can’t say I’ve ever had sex while sleeping.”
“Can’t say I recommend it.” Sean chuckled as he picked up his pullover from the bathroom floor and put it on. “We muddled through those early years together. Then Maxine discovered the queer community in graduate school and became comfortable with talking about her asexuality. It explained a lot of our bedroom friction.”
“I’m sorry.” As soon as I said it, I knew that probably wasn’t the right reply, and predictably, Sean bristled.
“Don’t be. It was a good life, and I had my right hand and porn for restless nights. We were both committed to raising the kids. Sex took a backseat, but we made a lot of great family memories. Then, she asked for a divorce. Said it was time. Kids are grown. Her career is global at this point. The marriage that had been so comfortable for us both had started to chafe, I guess.”
“But not for you?” Not in any particular hurry to get dressed, I wrapped my towel around my waist as Sean found his socks.
“Maxine said it wasn’t fair to me to keep it going. That I needed to get out there, find what would make me happy. I wasn’t so sure. I’m kind of a creature of habit. The marriage and lack of sex weren’t ideal, but things were familiar. I liked our house, our neighborhood, our friends, and my job. Our life, really. I liked that life.”
“Maxine’s not wrong.” I wasn’t sure what to make of Sean pining for a domesticity I’d never known or craved. This Maxine seemed wiser and more logical than Sean. Move on. That’s what I’d do, but then, that was what I’d always done. “So you took her advice finally? That’s why you said yes to me? An experiment? See if dick does it for you before you find the next Mrs.?”