Total pages in book: 145
Estimated words: 135792 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 679(@200wpm)___ 543(@250wpm)___ 453(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 135792 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 679(@200wpm)___ 543(@250wpm)___ 453(@300wpm)
Knox’s words from earlier now rattled in Liv’s head ominously.
We both know you’ll live longer.
Was he planning to just never tell Liv about his issue? How dare he ignore something this serious?
Frank hung his head. “Don’t make that the first thing he hears once he wakes up.”
“Why the hell not? It’s insane to ignore something like this,” Liv raged and entwined his fingers on his nape as he started pacing. He needed to see Knox and talk some sense into him. Right. The fuck. Now.
“You don’t know the reason. And you shouldn’t agitate him right out of surgery if he has a weak heart.”
Fucking Frank and his reasonable arguments when all Liv wanted to do was smash that vending machine, then go yell at Knox for ignoring health advice.
He wanted to raise his voice. To kick the machine until it broke, but when his gaze met Frank’s calm gaze, anger slowly simmered down. “He should have told me,” he muttered, thinking back to their pristine Subaru Impreza. They’d packed so much money into that car. And then, Liv himself wasted so much on dates and gifts for his many girlfriends. Even if all of that cash couldn’t have paid for the surgery Knox needed, it would have been a start.
“His parents… they must have chosen not to go through with it,” Liv muttered, dropping into the seat next to Frank’s.
"He probably didn't want to worry you. All you can do is show him that you’re capable of shouldering the burden." Frank patted his back, and strangely enough, that small gesture took away a bit of Liv’s pain. He was glad he didn’t have to sit here alone, but the support did nothing to relieve the guilt and anguish burning deep inside him.
Knox had been living with this problem since childhood, working overtime to pay for his meds while Liv’s only issue was the lack of cash for new car upholstery and booze.
“Maybe he didn’t trust me enough.”
Even saying that out loud hurt.
“He trusted you enough to get rid of a body with you,” Frank said quietly.
And then, Liv took Knox’s trust, played around with it, and threw it in his face. The empty corridor seemed to stretch on either side of them just like the time remaining until he could see Knox, and the inability to do anything about it was yet another reminder of his failures.
“I did something terrible.”
Frank stiffened and watched Liv like a hawk. “What did you do? Be honest with me. I can’t help you fix shit if you don’t tell me the truth.”
“You’ll fucking show us both the door,” Liv muttered, swallowing as he glanced Frank’s way. “We lied. When we came over, we weren’t a couple.”
Frank‘s frown deepened. “What? I knew something was off that first night.”
“But we are now,” Liv continued before Frank could have broken his eye socket with a single punch. “And I messed everything up by being an inconsiderate dick. He should have just let that bastard shoot me,” he admitted, frowning at the way his voice broke when he remembered the look on Knox’s face in that secondhand store.
Liv didn’t deserve his affection, or even his friendship, yet he wanted it anyway. So fucking badly.
Like he’d never wanted anything else in the world.
Frank hid his face in his hand. “What is this drama?”
“You ever flirted with someone without thinking while you were out with Ezra?” Liv asked and pulled up the sleeve of Cy’s jacket to show him the phone number written on his skin.
Frank scowled, then slapped the back of his head without much force. “Jesus Christ, Liv. Get a grip. I would have kicked your ass if I was your boyfriend.”
Boyfriend. Liv had denied even that to Knox, and now it was all he wanted, all he needed. Every time he thought back to Knox’s body losing blood all too fast and trembling against him, his heart filled with a desperate need to make sure Knox was always happy and healthy. To take care of him. The way a boyfriend would. But would Knox ever want him again?
He wouldn’t have.
“Fuck. I’m such a dick. I just… I didn’t even know it was this serious for him. And now I’m stuck here in… fucking agony, because the future feels too vague when I can’t hold on to his hand. What the hell is wrong with me?”
“Why would you even go off flirting with some random dude when you’re on a date with your smoking-hot boyfriend who clearly cares about you enough to take a bullet for you?” Frank didn’t mince words, but Liv probably needed to hear that out loud.
“It was a girl,” Liv mumbled in a small voice, not daring to look at Frank as the words left his mouth. “She was just there. She liked me. I wanted to check if I hadn’t… lost my charm, I guess.”