Total pages in book: 68
Estimated words: 66259 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 331(@200wpm)___ 265(@250wpm)___ 221(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 66259 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 331(@200wpm)___ 265(@250wpm)___ 221(@300wpm)
“Third time isn’t always a charm, Scar.”
I softly punch his shoulder. “Aren’t priests supposed to be optimistic?”
He looks away from me, his cheeks going red. “Yeah we’re supposed to be a lot of things, apparently.” He licks his lips. “You never asked, you know, why I became a priest.”
I tilt my head. “I guess it just never came up. After we rekindled our friendship, you were already a priest and I was already broken.”
“You were never broken, just a bit damaged, like a bird who—”
“Loses its wings?”
“Hell, no.” He laughs. “I’m not that cheesy. I was going to say like a sad little baby bird that gets kicked out of the nest and is forced to fly but goes splat over and over again.”
“Encouraging. I can see why your congregation loves you.”
He lets out a belly laugh. “Oh yeah, it’s definitely because they don’t like my good looks. Riveted, they’re riveted.”
“The deep voice helps.” I put my hand on his forearm, he reaches over and covers it with his. It’s warm, comforting.
His eyes flicker down to my mouth.
I don’t know what’s happening, but the firelight under the moon makes it feel dangerous, I start to slide my hand away, but he grips it firm. “We broke up, because I was an idiot, and when I finally got up enough courage to reach out a few months later you were already dating someone else, and then in a whirlwind of announcements you were engaged.”
“I was heartbroken,” I say simply. “And then some rich good-looking guy came along and treated me like glass, which I recently discovered is the worst possible thing ever and people like that should be kicked in the balls.”
“Repeatedly,” he agrees.
“And it felt like a fairy tale, and I was just getting over the darkness, I felt fulfilled and happy, and I wasn’t scared anymore or sad. He treated my family amazingly, and I fell hard and fast. I imagine this is how it feels to be conned? Anyway, he helped me get over you in the way I needed.”
“Wow.” Adrian drops my hand and looks away, then stands and starts pacing. “Are you telling me had I been a few weeks earlier? A month? That we’d be together right now?”
I frown. “Adrian, that’s not how the universe works.”
He kicks the chair next to him and tears at his hair. “Fuck!”
I jump a foot. He has his hands on his hips now and he’s looking away from me like he can’t bear to look at me.
“Adrian?”
He turns abruptly. “You always told me to follow my heart, and I was so fucking heartbroken that I followed my stupidass sister to her church, and I finally felt good about something about a purpose. I went into seminary that next week after graduation.”
My stomach drops. “Are you saying you became a priest…” I can’t say it, I can’t breathe the words out loud.
“Ironic.” He stares up at the sky again. “Wow.”
“You’re angry.”
“Of course I’m angry, Scarlett!”
“Please don’t yell,” I whisper.
“Sorry.” He squeezes his eyes shut. “Sorry, I’m not angry at you, I’m angry at myself, and maybe at the universe and the way it works.”
I stand and walk over to him, grabbing his arm. “Hey, this is how things were supposed to work out, right?”
He stares back down at me, I always forget how tall he is, how muscular. He swallows and shakes his head, and his eyes are lost before they fall to my mouth again.
No. No. I will not lose my best friend.
I slowly back away, but he jerks me against him, chest heaving.
“You made vows,” I whisper. “And I’m with someone else.”
“Vows can be broken, and not for long.”
I jerk away. “That’s cruel. That’s not you speaking.”
“It is.” He jerks up his chin. “It really is.”
“You’re talking out of anger and reacting. The past is in the past. Don’t, please don’t do something that will make me lose you again.”
He grabs my hand and slowly tugs me forward again. “Would it be so bad to love me?”
I smile. “I already do, just not the way you want me to, and not the way you love your job. Even you can’t deny that. You’d resent me. Eventually, you’d leave too. I can’t handle you leaving.” I start to cry. “I can’t imagine you leaving me again.”
“Scar…” Tears fill his eyes. He pulls me against him in a tight hug and starts running a hand down the back of my head, holding it against his chest. “You won’t. You won’t lose me, I’d cut my own heart out before that.”
“Gory.”
“You know how I feel about Scream.”
I laugh against his chest. “Please don’t let this come between us, don’t draw lines in the sand, let me live my present and future, the way you should too.”
“Wise words.” He sighs and draws away from me. “I um, I’m going to go take that walk you talked about.” Tears glisten in his eyes, his smile’s forced. “I’ll be back. Promise I won’t get attacked by a cougar, okay?”