Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 88225 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 441(@200wpm)___ 353(@250wpm)___ 294(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 88225 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 441(@200wpm)___ 353(@250wpm)___ 294(@300wpm)
“Well, since you’re grown, let’s see you get yourself out of this mess when it blows up in your face,” my father says.
I feel like I’ve been punched in the chest. I don’t know what I thought would happen after coming here. However, I didn’t think it would be more of this. The phone conversation had been hard enough.
“You’re right. You raised me. You raised me to be fair and loving.” I stand and collect my things. “You raised me to make the best decisions for me. I love you both. Have a good night.”
“Saga,” my mother calls as I start out of the room. “Saga. Where are you going?”
“Home,” I call back and keep moving.
Bishop
My heart wasn’t in that performance tonight. All I could think about was finishing the last two shows so I could head home to my wife. I fucked up royally.
“Hey, baby,” I say into the phone.
“Hey,” she says, sounding so broken.
I press a hand to my face, trying to get my tired brain to come up with a way to make this better. I’m so angry with myself. It’s been so long since I let the press push my buttons.
“I need you to know why I lost it,” I say.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to explain,” she says. Then I swear I hear her sniffle.
“Are you crying?”
“It’s been a long day.”
“I’m coming home. Fuck this tour,” I say as I stand and start throwing things into my bag.
“Bishop, you need to finish the tour. I’m fine. Dwayne said he’ll stay at the house with me until you get back. Isha will be here tomorrow. I’ll be okay,” she says softly.
I shove a hand in my hair and tug. This is such a clusterfuck. It’s only a few days, but I want to be with my wife.
“The press has been the worst part of this gig. I love the music. The fans—for the most part, they’re amazing, but the press… Bev… she said she cheated on me because I cheated first.
“She believed everything they said. I guess when those reporters started talking that shit, it just triggered something. I don’t want to lose you,” I say.
I’m met with silence. I drop down onto the bed and put my head in my hand. I don’t know what I was expecting, but silence wasn’t it.
“I think you’re forgetting our beginning already. They took innocent moments and spun the stories they wanted. I was there the other night. I know what happened,” she says, breaking the silence.
She continues. “Even if there’s a time that I’m not there, I’ve learned to trust you in ways I don’t trust many. I got on a tour bus with you three and a half weeks ago and then I said I do. That’s a lot of trust, Bishop.”
“Yeah, you’re right.”
I blow out a breath and scrub my hand down my face. Saga deserves so much better than this. I haven’t been her husband for forty-eight hours yet and I’m fucking up.
“How was your show?” she asks.
“It sucked. My muse is gone. I couldn’t get into it.”
I lie back on the bed and stare up at the ceiling. I’d do anything to turn the clock back. I just need to go back to standing outside of that shop.
“I’m not gone. I’m right here in your enormous bed.”
“I wish I were there with you. I bet you look sexy as fuck on my black sheets. I can’t wait to stain them with your cum,” I say as I think of her lying in my bed.
She laughs. “I stumbled across the linen closet. Babe, all your sheets are black.”
I release a real laugh for the first time since the last time she was happy and secure in my arms. She makes everything so easy. Even as she’s hurting, she’s making this better for me. I love her all the more for it.
“We can change anything about the house you don’t like.”
“It’s huge. Lots of room for a little family,” she says hopefully.
“I’m ready whenever you are.”
“Really?”
I smile at the excitement in her voice. I also hear the hint of surprise. This is all uncharted territory. Yeah, I’ve told her I want to be a father, but we never talked about us having a family or when we’d want to do that. Things most couples talk about before getting married.
“Yeah, babe. I want gorgeous babies with you as soon as you’re ready. I hope they take solely after you. You’re perfect,” I say.
“How about little boys that look like you and girls that look like me? Even trade,” she says sweetly.
“I don’t care as long as they’re with you, I’m happy.”
I try to picture us lying in my bed together. Her belly swollen, our home filled with kids. I want all of that with her.
“Bishop?”
“Yeah, baby.”
“I hate this.” This time, I can hear her sobbing. “I know I’m doing the right thing. I know what I feel. I… I’m sorry. I’m going to go to bed.”